I got a wonderful late Christmas present yesterday….well, actually I got two, because my mom had misplaced my gift in her car. So from my mom, I got a gift certificate for a manicure (MUCH needed), and from Matthew, I got a little freedom (VERY MUCH needed).
We started Matthew out sleeping in our room from the very beginning when we came home. This is what he was used to in Korea, and our main priority was to make him feel safe and comfortable. We had a place set up for him on the floor, and sometimes he would end up in our bed with us at night. While this was necessary at first, it got old very quickly for me, as I am not a huge fan of co-sleeping in the first place.
First of all, I immediately lost out on my favorite part of the day. Getting in bed at night with a book or watching TV. Nope, there’s a kid sleeping in there, must be very quiet. And it always seemed like when I would get in bed and get settled, he would start crying or have a night terror or simply get restless. I was starting to think our presence was disturbing him as much as his was disturbing me.
I must tell you something about Matthew–you may think I’m kidding, but this is so true. He hits his head on anything and everything. It is like there is a magnet in his head (a strong one!) that is drawn to any and all hard surfaces. Think about this–when have you ever, while sleeping, banged your head against your headboard? I’m sure never. For him, I would say that happens multiple times every night. Or against our nightstand or dresser, which we would try to block with pillows to protect him. It really is the strangest thing.
So having a fussy, head banging child in my room and sometimes my bed was starting to wear on me. I’m sure that sounds selfish, and it probably is, but I want my own space to relax in. And I think kids need their own space too. And what I have learned is that I can much better deal with a crying or upset child in their own room than one in my bed.
So why in the world have we waited so long to try it? Well, now his night terrors are really rare, so I think he is settling in more and feeling secure enough for this. Also, we had issues with the bed we had initially purchased for him. He really needed rails on both sides to keep him from rolling out, but with the frame we had we couldn’t use them. So we have been needing to buy a new frame and boxspring and we didn’t have a way to get them home. Finally everything fell into place and my sister was here with her big SUV, so we went for it. Jason was so motivated he set the bed up immediately upon bringing it home last night, even skipping dinner. I’ll let you decide why he was so motivated to get the child out of our room!
And in the end, Matthew went down fine in his bed. He slept great all night! I peeked in at him at 2 and then he cried a little around 5 and I found him at the bottom of the bed close to falling out. Once I got him re-settled he went immediately back to sleep! This is also going to be so much better for in the mornings, because Matthew likes to sleep a little longer than Isaac. In his own room, that will be much easier for him.
Next step is to start weaning him off the bottle–I really don’t think he will be too upset about it, but I’m going to wait until after New years for that one. Small steps, small steps. For now, I am celebrating my victory by…..laying in my bed while he naps in his own room!