Protected: Caption Contest March 31, 2011
Whatnot Wednesday March 30, 2011
- Remember our weird neighbors? And the sign they put out for us? How could you forget? Well, it got flipped back over and Jason took a picture.I told you they were freaks! Of course, they probably have pictures of us up on their blog saying we are freaks too. But we all know who’s right, don’t we? Don’t we??
- I started a new book last night called A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. It is by Donald Miller. Although I normally stick to fiction, I am loving this book–the writing is superb and funny and witty and I found myself chuckling aloud a few times. The book begins when movie producers approach the author about making a movie of his life, and how this spurred a lot of reflection and a desire to make his life a story worth telling. Here is a quote from the author’s note:
So here I am, only 32 pages in, but recommending this book to you. So far, both as someone who loves to tell my story and who yearns to have a meaningful one, I am enjoying this book immensely.
- Isaac has been skipping his nap more and more. Some days it’s not a real problem, other than the fact that it makes for a really long day for me (and isn’t it all about me???). But some days, he is at the end of his rope by dinnertime. One night, he was eating a clementine with his dinner and he asked me to sing the Clementine song. You know the one–oh my darlin’, oh my darlin’, oh my darlin’ Clementine. I sang it once and then he asked me to sing it again. Halfway through the second time, he was SOBBING, saying why was the clementine lost and gone forever???? Where did it go???
- Is it just me, or does the pertussis vaccine commercial induce panic attacks in all mothers? I mean, I think that’s kind of the point (to scare you enough to GET the vaccine), but my sensitive nervous system can’t really handle the sound of an infant struggling to breathe. The worst is when I have the TV on while the boys are napping and that commercial comes on and suddenly I am running upstairs in terror to see which of my children is hyperventrilicating.
- For 3 points, name the movie that spawned the word “hyperventrilicating”.
- Quote from Isaac: “Superman is a superhero and so is God”. I asked him where he heard that. His response? “I didn’t heared it. I just knowed it”. Don’t you just love a man with convictions?
Protected: Responsibility and Little Dragons March 28, 2011
A Real Life Guest Blogger March 25, 2011
**Congratulations to my friends Deb and Joanna, who were the ones to correctly guess that Jason and I were at a Poison concert! What better place for a pregnant lady to do the Unskinny Bop? In looking back at the picture, the biggest shock to me is that my husband actually WENT to a Poison concert (although for all of you who guessed Kenny Chesney, that would have been even more unlikely for him–he loathes country music). The biggest shock to my husband after looking at the picture? And I quote–“I had forgotten how big your bazoongas were”.**
Today I have a guest post up over at my friend’s blog–A Chosen Child. Jenny is a bloggy friend turned real friend who I hope to meet in person one day soon. She and I share similar interests such as hanging out in our pajamas and eating junk food, even–and especially when–on vacation. I was drawn to her blog by her beautiful writing, but stuck around for the beautiful friendship. She is in Korea right now meeting her daughter, Chloe, and preparing to come home.
Go visit her blog to read what I had to say about the marathon that is the adjustment/attachment/bonding process for a new family formed by adoption. Don’t forget to leave a comment so that she will think I am very important and have lots of people who are dying to hear what I have to say to encourage her.
Pop Quiz March 24, 2011
Yesterday while rummaging in a desk drawer, I came across Isaac’s baby book. I decided to sit down and flip through it, because I haven’t updated it for a while….you know, like, since he was a baby. Now I just stuff our family Christmas card in it every year and that’s about it. So I thought I’d take a walk down memory lane.
It wasn’t just the picture that made me laugh, or even the fact that I am asking a LOT of that non-maternity shirt. It was the caption I wrote below the picture that explained what concert we were at. And yes, I know I shouldn’t end a sentence with a preposition. Let’s try that again: It was the caption I wrote below the picture that explained what concert we were at, dawg.
I thought it would be fun if you guess whose music we were rocking out to. Actually “rocking out” is relative when you have swollen feet. How about “reclining out” to?
I will list 10 concerts that I have attended and you tell me which one you think I attended during this late stage of knocked-upedness. The year was 2006, if that makes any difference.
- Dixie Chicks
- John Mayer
- Elliot Yamin
- Counting Crows
- Stone Temple Pilots
- Foo Fighters
- Kenny Chesney
- Ben Folds
So which of these artists traumatized my fetus forever? Actually two of them did, because I remember going to 2 concerts that month, but which artist was traumatizing my fetus during this picture? I can’t wait to see what everybody guesses.
Whatnot Wednesday March 23, 2011
- Isaac sleeps with so many stuffed animals and blankets–it’s obscene really. He told me the other day that his bed was ‘clevered’ in toys! Hmmm, I do not think that word means what you think it means. Anyhow, last night at 3 AM, he called me into his room. Underneath all the mess, he had found a head lamp (one of those headband things with a lamp on it that you only ever see on spelunkers and Amazing Race contestants), of all things! He was apparently taking inventory of his cuddly toys and realized “that’s not supposed to be in here!!!”.
- You know how it’s bad to go to the grocery store when you’re hungry? I’ve figured out what’s worse–going to Krispy Kreme when you haven’t had lunch. I did that last week with the boys. It was 4:30 and I had spaced out on lunch (for me–of course the boys had eaten). My intention was to get each of us a doughnut. But then came the perfect storm of my hunger and a coupon I had for “Buy one dozen, get one dozen FREE”. I wasn’t gonna do it, but then I began to feel woozy and had a Shelby, drink your juice moment at the window and heard myself ordering 24 doughnuts. It was an out of body experience. But we made it work.
- I have been waking up a lot at night to find my arms numb. For as long as I can remember, I have slept in the same position–on my stomach, with my arms straight and underneath my body….and the covers pulled almost over my head. Cute, right? Well, apparently, lately I’ve been sleeping on my side, with my arms crossed. Like I’m about to give somebody a lecture in my sleep. But I keep waking up like that and my arms are all numb. I was telling Jason this and he responded, “so now you even SLEEP in angry mom posture?”. I guess so. This is what my children have pushed me to.
- I was reading the book “We’re Different, We’re the Same” with Isaac and when it was over he told me that he likes to be the same. Since clearly we are all different (wasn’t he paying attention to the theme of the book??), I asked him who he wanted to be the same as. He said, “Daddy. I want to be the same as Daddy.” I told him that if there was anyone he should want to be like, it is his Daddy. Smart kid.
- I am looking for a new skin care line. I think there should be special skin care for women in their 30s. It needs to address both aging and acne. Something along the lines of “Clearasil for Fine Lines”. If you come across anything like that, let me know.
- How do you pronounce foyer? I really want to know. I say “foy-er”. But then a lot of people say “foi- yay”, which sounds pretentious to me. According to dictionary.com, both pronounciations are correct. All I know is I laugh when I’m watching House Hunters and for the most part, everybody is totally regular but then they say things like “foi-yay” and “en suite!”. Maybe the prounounciation depends on the price of the house–anything over $400K deserves a French accent? In which case, we will just call ours an entryway.
Admit it, We’re All a Little Ignorant March 22, 2011
Adoptive families have kind of a camraderie going in regards to the whacked out comments they get from strangers regarding the way their family was formed. Overall, our family has been pretty lucky. People have said things to us, of course, some of it lovely, some of it cringeworthy, and as I reflect on how I feel about this and the way I know other adoptive parents feel about this, I have come to the conclusion that we are all a little ignorant.
It’s true. Adoptive families know a lot about adoption. We’ve read books, taken classes, and we are living an experience that not everybody knows a lot about or has taken the time to think through extensively. And that’s actually okay. Until we adopted, I had never really given a lot of thought to what were appropriate questions to ask people about how their families were formed and what were inappropriate.
As a matter of fact, I will admit, in this public forum that I once made a huge faux pas with a friend. It wasn’t out of malice, or even nosiness, it was simply out of ignorance. I have a friend who was in the process of domestic adoption. We met and began growing close just around the time that a birthmother chose my friend and her husband to parent her son. One day we were talking on the phone about the adoption and all of the upcoming events. I asked if she was going to meet the birthmother. And then I asked if she knew why the birthmother was choosing not to parent.
I know–completely and totally none of my business. Under any circumstances. I am mortified TO THIS VERY DAY. But I just hadn’t thought it through at all. I was genuinely interested in her life and her excitement over the adoption, and as someone who wanted to adopt one day, I (selfishly) wanted an insider’s view. Okay, maybe I was being nosy.
My friend calmly, casually and graciously explained what I absolutely know now that this was HER SON’S history and information and that it wouldn’t be appropriate to share all of that with others. Duh. I understood immediately and was also humbled that she had been so graceful in the way she explained it to me.
That experience for me has always reminded me that when people ask things that are none of their business, probably 80-90% of the time it’s because they are genuinely interested. They aren’t trying to be inappropriate (even though sometimes they are), they are really trying to relate to your situation and get to know you better.
(The other 10% of the time, people are just rude and they want to push your buttons. Asking “How much did he cost?” or insulting a family’s decision to adopt internationally? Give me a break–anybody should know that is offensive.)
Does that make it any less uncomfortable? Probably not–especially when you have your kids with you. The fact is that we can answer with a smart comeback or with grace. And if you choose grace, that person will probably walk away a lot more informed and will remember that conversation (much like I remember the conversation with my friend).
The truth is, I still have to remember to keep my mouth shut about some things. I’m educated enough not to make too many blunders around adoptive families (I hope!), but this experience has made me more aware of the things I ask anyone. I really try to ask myself if it is any of my business and if it’s not, I stay quiet.
There is another mom that I sit with during Isaac’s swim lessons. I taught her water aerobics class when she was pregnant and I really like her. Her daughter is so cute and I always find myself wanting to ask if they will have more. But it’s none of my business. For all I know they are trying and not having any luck. For all I know she has lost 3 pregnancies since her daughter was born. For all I know, she is 7 weeks pregnant and keeping it under wraps for now. If she wants me to know, she will tell me. No matter how much I like her and want to be friendly with her, her reproductive life is simply not my business.
And I have to remind myself of this because I am a talkative person who likes to find common ground with others.
We all stick our feet in our mouths sometimes. Whether it’s speaking before we think or just ignorance about a certain situation, you have to admit, you have probably said the wrong thing at least once. Hopefully the person you said it to showed you grace and hopefully you will return the favor when, inevitably, somebody says something that makes steam come out of your ears.