- Matthew has a hard time staying on task. I’m sure it’s age-related, but man, his attention span can be really poor if we ask him to do something. Now if he’s doing something of his own accord, he could literally concentrate on it for hours–okay, not hours, but maybe like tens of minutes, which is a long time for a 3 year old . The other night we asked him to go potty and wash his hands because dinner was almost ready. He started pulling down his pants in the living room which is already a poor choice, because he has to go upstairs to get to the bathroom, and walking up the stairs when your pants are around your ankles is hard enough for well-coordinated folk. Anyway, he was taking a while and Jason went to check on him and found him sitting at the bottom of the stairs with his pants and underwear around his ankles, playing with a car that he had found there. I am going to keep this story on file in case I ever have to have an “it’s time for Ritalin” talk with my pediatrician. Just kidding. Maybe.
- I shared an amusing honeymoon story last week, but my “entertainment” debut wasn’t the only memorable thing that happened on that trip. On about Day 4, Jason started coming down with a troubling rash. It was in the crooks of his elbows and was very itchy. And it was spreading down his arms. We went to the resort nurse who told us it was a sunburn. Um look, we’re not doctors, but we ARE pasty Americans and we know what sunburns look and feel like. Do you see my freckles and sun damage??? She was no help, but we were leaving the next day, so we decided it could wait. After getting back into the States, I called my mom and she immediately said (with just a hint of demented glee in her voice, if I remember correctly), oh he has scabies….which are body lice if you are not familiar. Jason immediately got defensive, although I have no idea why. Definitely not because I told him to stay away from me because I didn’t want to get it and then give it to our pets. We got back on a weekend night so he couldn’t see a doctor, but a pharmacist told us that we could just buy lice shampoo and apply it all over our bodies, leaving it there for the directed amount of time. So there we were, home from our honeymoon standing in the shower together, naked and covered in stinky lice shampoo. Staring at each other. The honeymoon was literally over. Jason later saw a doctor who confirmed the diagnosis and wrote a prescription. I wrote a letter to the resort and they immediately apologized and offered us 5 nights at any of their resorts for FREE. So for our first anniversary, we had a lovely, paid-for trip in the Bahamas, which was WAY nicer than Antigua. Now I’m not the one who had the lice, but I must say, they were totally worth it. I wouldn’t mind catching them myself one day if it meant a free vacation.
- On Monday, Isaac ceased bludgeoning me with superheroes, and we had a nice little game of doctor. First I was the patient. He looked in my mouth and said wow, you got a deep breath (I think that was supposed to be “take a deep breath”). He pulled out his stethoscope and said, now let’s take a look and see what God is saying (you know, because God lives in my heart and all). Then he was the patient and his main symptom was well, I sleep a lot and when I sleep, well, my tummy gets cold. We solved that one by putting silkie under his shirt for extra insulation. Then I got to be the patient again and my symptom was an itchy elbow. He knew that was below his station because he squinted at me and said, well….doctors don’t do that, I’ll go get a nurse.
- Everybody has a song that makes them cry every single time they hear it, right? I know I do, but mine’s kind of embarrassing. Don’t laugh, but it’s “Flying without Wings” by Ruben Studdard. I’m serious. I CANNOT hear it without crying–and forget trying to sing along with it. Right when I hit this part I go straight to the ugly cry: So, impossible as they may seem/You’ve got to fight for every dream/Cause who’s to know which one you let go/Would have made you complete. And I’m usually not a sucker for the uplifting/inspiring song genre. But I love me some Ruben (who is a Birmingham native), and I always picture him singing it at the American Idol finale with a black gospel choir backing him up. Hello? A black gospel choir makes everything more emotional. And I don’t care if you think I’m cheesy. I will listen to this song turned up loud in my car with my windows open doing the ugly cry while I drive to the dollar theater to see “Justin Beiber: Never Say Never”. I have no shame.
- Speaking of crying during American Idol…..the season that was on when I was pregnant featured my favorite contestant of all time: Elliot Yamin. Remember him? The lovable dude in dire need of a makeover with some serious SOUL?? Here’s a before/after picture to job your memory.Oh, this boy could sing and he LOVED his mama, and she was in the audience every night gettin’ all misty eyed. And here I was pregnant, and knowing I was gonna have a boy and just praying I could raise up a boy as nice and talented as Elliot. I bawled just about every week when he sang. Later when he was done with American Idol and had gotten a great makeover and dropped an album (see, I’m cool–I know the lingo!), Jason surprised me with tickets to see him. He was still fabulous, but I didn’t cry. I did, however almost fall asleep because concerts don’t start until late at night. And I? Am old…..and spent most of that night wishing I was under my electric blanket. But I still love me some Elliot Yamin.