Every day the wonderful happens…

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Force Field July 5, 2011

Filed under: and that's how I feel about that — Elizabeth @ 11:39 AM

A 5-hour road trip.  Alone.

A rare luxury of time in the car without 2 voices shouting demands from the backseat.  No packing of snacks, DVDs, or toys.  My only thought was me–a bottle of water and my ipod, and I was taken care of.

I rolled down the windows and let all of my cares blow away.  This weekend, I didn’t have plan for anybody else.  The responsibilities of wife and mother were on hold for 48 hours.

Driving through a rural area, I passed a small farmhouse.  A tractor was tilling the field next to the house and clouds of dust billowed up behind it.  I imagined living there–saw myself in a faded sundress making lunch for my husband who had been working in the field.  Would we would be a family who drank sweet tea out of old Mason jars, who rose early every morning to milk cows?  Would I load my children onto a bus to attend a rural school?  Would I have to plan my shopping every week for my one big trip into town?  Would I be happier living a simpler life like that?

I drove on toward the coast and passed an old rundown motel.  They were luring customers there with luxurious amenities like the promise of a remote controlled televisions.  I thought of the people who stayed there, maybe some people lived there.  What if I just moved to the beach?  Started cleaning vacation houses and stayed in a place like that?  I saw myself bronze and tanned, in a pair of cut-off shorts.  No mortgage, no responsibilities, no possessions, no gadgets.  Doing a simple job on my own time, and bumming around on the beach.

All weekend, I observed the people and places around me and tried on different identities.  Could I be a mom that is that laid back?  A different kind of wife?  Could I live somewhere else?

My time away was short.  When I went to bed on Saturday night, my plan was to spend some time on the beach Sunday before coming home.  But I awoke Sunday morning to the pull.  I spent an hour outside reading by myself and drinking my coffee, and then it was enough.  It was time to succumb to the force field that I never expect, but always comes–the one that pulls me back home.  The one that reminds me that no matter how much fun I am having elsewhere, there is no other place I’d rather be than with my family.  In my home.

I  hopped in the van and called my husband.  “Hello, love,” he answered and I could hear the smile in his voice.

And I knew.  I am exactly who I need to be in the exact place I need to be.  And I am there with exactly who I’m supposed to be with.  And I couldn’t get back to that perfect place fast enough.

I pressed the gas a little harder. 

Can you thaw out  some pork chops, babe? I’m on my way home.


8 Responses to “Force Field”

  1. Yvonne Says:

    and how awesome is that?! love it – that you had time away and that you wanted to go back home to the life you love.

  2. deb jacobs Says:

    it’s so great that you got to have time by yourself to relax and reflect. but i always do the same thing too. i’m always so glad to be home xx

  3. I love that you came full-circle. I have to admit to feeling QUITE jealous of your time alone, and now I’m craving it too. But ultimately, I would come to the same conclusion that my life is pretty sweet right now. A great place to be eh? Happy for you 🙂

  4. claudia Says:

    I love, love, love this. Beautiful. In every way.

  5. Grace Says:

    this is so beautiful…are you going to fill us in on the deets of your solo trip, though?!

  6. Kelly Says:

    so lovely. i know this feeling and it’s a good one.

  7. Melissa Says:

    How fun that you had some alone time, and how sweet that it made you want to come back home.

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